Using EFT to Enhance Spiritual Awakening
Connecting with the deeper Self over the mind made self
Fraeda Scholz EFT-Adv, Maya Balenz EFT-Adv, LMT
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This article is about an EFT session I facilitated with my friend , Maya. Maya and I met 2-1/2 years ago, in May of 2007, when we each had known EFT for about 6 months. In July of '07, Maya and I began trading EFT sessions on a bi-monthly basis.
Since November of '06, Maya has become a serious student of A Course in Miracles, a mind training course in forgiveness that focuses upon noticing egoic thoughts. I too have read many books on metaphysics and spirituality and this is a big interest of mine, as well. Recently, Maya's learning has led her to a mind training practice of looking at the ego with her higher guidance, so that she might release the past--ie, her identification with her life story, along with that false sense of 'self'. A few months ago she had a novel idea and telephoned me from California, proposing that we do some EFT sessions for her to help her release the past and to remove the blocks to Love's Presence inside her.
Over the past 3 months, we had 5 EFT sessions with this as our focus. At the end of each session, her SUDS went down to 0. And in her own words,
“ I felt a profound and dramatic shift into feeling/being that divine Love that I was longing for. I shifted over into deep and global mind states of bliss, surrender, peace and communion with Loving Presence, in a 'Now' moment, that I experienced as eternal. This shift was deeper and felt truer than my past experiences with Divine Presence. Fear dissolved. Worry vanished. I came to recognize the old familiar, habitual and negative **egoic mind chatter as just flimsily that--nothing more than mind chatter, instead of identifying with or getting lost in it. It was a most impressively easy and rapid shift progressing me toward my goals, of letting *God in, while the ego appeared to lose its compelling hold over my mind. Sometimes this shift would last for a couple of days. Sometimes for 10 days. And now, I have the confidence that I can return to those places, with the focus of EFT. It is becoming easier and easier for me to return to that Loving Presence, and there is less fear, less resistance and more ease in clearing the seeming egoic obstacles that arise in my mind. I firmly believe that all disease begins in the mind, and that is where the true healing lies--in the mind.”
*'God' for Maya is not a religious word, but a word meaning the underlying consciousness of All That Is. Some call It Source Energy, Universal Wisdom, Zero Point Field or a dozen other names.
**The “ego” as Maya understands it from The Course: “The 'ego' is the little false seemingly separated 'self' created in the mind that habitually controls our thinking; reinforcing the feeling of separation, through attack thoughts such as comparisons, criticism and judgment. It seems to love but does not know love and forms special alliances to exclude others. It thrives on guilt and fear in an attempt to keep God's love away. Egoic thoughts focus on the past and the future. The Course instructs people to let go of seeing themselves and others as separate and to look at their judgments with the higher power, seeking to join with all of humanity, in the mind, to turn away from the ego and return the mind homeward to God, living a more peaceful life in this seeming world.”
I co-wrote this article with Maya, in order to share with others our experience and insight into the EFT process during those 5 sessions. It also explains our conclusions from our current perspectives. In this article, we give the most essential details of our last session, in January 2010.
It is important to note that even though I am not a student of A Course in Miracles, Maya has explained its focus and principles, which are similar to what I have learned from practicing Vipassina meditation, listening to Eckhart Tolle, reading Ken Wilbur, David Hawkins and others. I did not need to agree with or perfectly well understand all of Maya's beliefs in order to be a helpful witness and facilitator to her process with EFT. True, some understanding was helpful, but a person facilitating EFT for another should always guard against projecting their own beliefs and values onto the other person--an experience that Maya has suffered through with others in the past. When both people feel comfortable and ready, it is absolutely possible in my experience for a person to assist another in their process of clearing the blocks to Love's Presence (or whatever spiritual state they are seeking) using EFT.
The other thing I think can be extremely helpful is to develop a strong trust between the two people before embarking on this kind of journey. As the facilitator, I highly recommend that you trust and respect the other person's process. In Maya's case, she has lots of intuitive knowing which direction to pursue, and she is also willing to trust me, and tells me when to take the reins, as she surrenders deeper into the process. Maya and I share a common belief that every human being ultimately has connection to the Truth (not to be confused with intellectual or informational truth) about reality, the very spark of Life, who they really Are. EFT simply removes the blocks, patterns and false mind structures that hinder our connection to that Truth. We know and trust that whatever the other person brings to the session is right for them at the time, and support them in deeply and completely loving and accepting themselves, as we accept them. We know and trust that as they clear whatever appears to be upsetting them, a natural recognition of a deeper Truth tends to emerge. The point here is that you don't need to know ahead of time where the session is going, if you and the other person have confidence and trust in the process. As Gary Craig says, “Through you rather than by you.” You also don't need to be free of your own egoic mind to facilitate this type of session, I am certainly not free of mine.
We are not in any way formal spiritual teachers or psychologists. But, these sessions with Maya demonstrate that it is possible to help others to remove their blocks, to connect to a natural spiritual process of opening to Love, peace and knowing who you really Are using EFT. No, Maya has not reached enlightenment, but in her words,
“My awakening process is well on its way. In each of the 5 EFT sessions, I have come a little closer to freedom from the small-minded egoic thoughts and a little closer to my True Nature, which is everyone's True Nature, feeling the unconditional Love, guiltlessness, gratitude, awe and unity of all beings.”
Below are some of the details of the 5th session which lasted about 80 minutes. I cannot overstate the importance of all the work Maya has done, over the past 3 years, that lead her to prepare herself for this session. There is no guarantee that anyone else will have the same experience, in the same amount of time; most likely, their process will look very different, and be uniquely theirs. People must take responsibility and make their own decisions about whether to use EFT or how to use it. The path is known to each by stumbling along it.
This 5th EFT session began with Maya presenting 2 main issues:
l. A family issue, ongoing for a long time, which will impact her life in a big way. She has tapped on this issue as it has unfolded, since '06, a process that will likely continue as it unfolds amongst her family members. The day before the session, she met with some family members on a conference call. The content of the call stirred old feelings and new perspectives in Maya and she quickly became lost in them.
2. Maya saw this family issue and her reactiveness to it, as a way that her 'ego' mind caught her up in an old familiar web of anguish and anxiety. She believed she became upset because her ego mind wanted to play with the event in order to drag her back into the, “seductive drama of my life story and keep me distracted from my spiritual connection to Love's Presence in my mind.”
Her two main beliefs/judgments that came out of #1 above, were that she was both a 'guilty perpetrator/sinner' and an 'innocent blaming victim' of family circumstances. These judgments were doing a 'nice' job of keeping her focus away from staying present in the Now moment, and letting in the feeling of divine Love and protection that she knew was there. Maya's SUDS level on both of these issues ranged from a 5-8 out of 10.
After Maya described the issues and her distress for about 20 minutes, we started tapping on the presenting issue with her family and how she felt about it. Knowing that what was underneath it was the egoic mind trying to stir her up to keep her from being in the Love of God, and keeping her thoughts identified with the little mind's story about her. Before the first round she had an inspiration, and suggested an idea of a way to tap and address the issue: Why not speak as though she were her ego? This is a powerful Gesthalt technique, Maya had learned in college, some 40 years earlier.
Although some of the setup phrases sound extreme, these were of Maya's choosing to enhance the depth and emotion of her state of mind, so as to make it bigger and help it to clear or dissolve.
This is the setup phrase we used, tapping as if Maya were her ego. We also used the entire basic EFT recipe, including the 9-gamut tapping procedure through every tapping round in the session.
Set up phrases for round 1 of tapping:
* Even though I am a guilty, complicit, perpetrator sinner and a victim contaminated by the circumstances of my family, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
* Even though I am afraid that if I don't stay on top of my ego, I am going to become a wreck and succumb to this seductive story it is telling me, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
After round 1 of tapping, her SUDS went down several points. Maya then brought up two fearful thoughts/beliefs:
1. I need to keep my guilt, in order to hide how bad I am from others, and to keep me from doing monstrous things. Guilt will make me appear 'good', even though I'm bad.
2. It is so hard to go against the tide of collective egoic human consciousness that has been going on
for thousands of years. (Maya wanted to go against this tide, but she felt the weight of the consciousness of the people around her, and of history that keeps reinforcing that she is this story in her egoic mind thoughts. )
Maya then began to connect with a deep (albeit transitory) sadness about how her ego had tricked her into keeping out the Love from Divine Source. She began to weep during this next round, and her sadness SUDS was up to an 8. She had not been aware of any sadness before the first tapping round.
Set up phrases for rounds 2 and 3 of tapping:
* Even though I still have some of this story that I am a guilty complicit perpetrating sinner, and that I am a victim contaminated by circumstances, and it's sad, I deeply and completely love and forgive myself.
* Even though I feel the need to keep my guilt in order to hide how bad I am and to keep myself from doing monstrous things, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
* Even though it is so hard to go against the tide of collective egoic human consciousness, and I feel sad, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
We tapped a couple of rounds on the above, and the SUDS level went down each time. In the middle,
Maya stopped and expressed a new arising feeling of deep compassion for all people who are living in
so much suffering, especially mental suffering, because of their blocks to Love. Maya began to cry
again, not just for herself, but for everyone.
At this point, a big shift started happening. Maya noticed a flood of feeling of Love and gratitude inside. All her SUDS were now down to 2's and 3's, and some were down to 0.
Set up phrases for round 4 of tapping:
*Even though I still have some of this sadness that I was seduced by the story and that kept me from the Love from Source, I deeply and completely love and forgive myself.
*Even though it still feels a little hard to go against the tide of collective egoic human consciousness, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
* Even though I still have a little need to hang on to this guilt, in order to appear 'good', I deeply and completely love and forgive myself.
At this point, Maya shifted more and reported that, “I am feeling the Love pouring in, from inside myself.” She then created affirmations that connected to her feelings and to some concepts learned from A Course in Miracles. We tapped just on these affirmations, which arose from Maya alone. I did not add to them nor question them or decide if I believed in them, etc.
Round 5 alternating points, we tapped on these affirmations:
* I can stay on top of this, with the help from Holy Spirit.
* I let go of this struggle with the transformative power of the Holy Spirit beside me.
* I let go of guilt and remember the innocence of all my brothers. We are invulnerable.
* Nothing can keep the power of the Love from Source away, not even my egoic 'self'
During this tapping round, Maya began to weep, out of, “overwhelming gratitude, awe and humility.”
She then said she felt guided to keep the tapping words sparse for the next round, with one short phrase.
Final round of the session was this single affirmation only:
This awe, this Love, this gratitude.
Although this was a phone session, Maya and I sat together (although 500 miles apart) in silence for a little while, being present with the moment. We checked her original SUDS levels, which had
ranged from 5 to 8. All were now at a 0. The original judgments and beliefs felt totally irrelevant and absurd to her now, “Simply silly egoic thoughts. Signifying nothing, next to the powerful feeling of connection to Source, after which I had sought for so long. Simply resting in the arms of God. Home.”
In this EFT session, Maya arrived to a place she knew was there, but could not get to with the intellectual understanding alone. EFT was a liberating tool to assist her to release some of the blocks and mental patterns that had kept her distracted by her life story.
I would like to emphasize that this EFT session and process was not done on a whim nor was it just a nice idea of Maya's, in which we merely tapped a few light rounds and got to this end result. Maya has been working hard toward these goals for a long long time, wanting with all her heart to open to the Love from within. At times, she felt some very intense and frightening 'dark' feelings, through this process, and in many many prior EFT sessions with me. She was willing to look at these difficult places inside herself and to acknowledge them, to herself and to me, sometimes with overwhelming shame and fear, in order to clear and heal them. This is the first time I have witnessed the EFT process take someone to that place, to connect with Love, to release what was in the way so quickly and so elegantly.
EFT really does work on almost anything. Gary Craig, in a recent retirement interview, said that EFT is pointing to something much larger and more spiritual in nature. I agree and I think we can use EFT to go beyond just getting over physical and emotional pain, or not feeling upset. We can use EFT to entertain and explore the frontiers of who we really are, underneath our stories of suffering, events, beliefs, and identity. For serious students of EFT, I recommend exploring the reaches of human consciousness, using EFT to release spiritual blocks and to open to who and what you are in the deepest sense of being by using the terminology, inspiration and teachings that resonate with you. Inner peace is really where it's at and EFT is a profound tool for that journey.
Fraeda Scholz: I am an EFT practitioner in Eugene, Oregon. I do EFT in face to face sessions as well as over the phone and in local workshops. My specialites are self-esteem, life-transitions, fears and adult motherless daughters. I also do other energy psychology techniques including PSYCH-K and Emotional Interference Patters. I love this work! And it is a pleasure and an honor to help people heal and connect with their deeper truth. Contact me about this article or for sessions: www.EmoWell-being.com (541)521-9953 email@example.com
Maya Balenz is an EFT practioner in Sebastopol Calafornia. She conducts EFT sessions face to face as well as over the phone. Contact her about this article or for sessions: firstname.lastname@example.org
Posted August 21, 2010 06:48 PM
Fraeda and Maya,
I feel tears forming in my eyes as I write this...
There is much out there that is described as spiritual which is little more than a new shade of egoic distraction... I was therefore very surprised to see such a profound article.
Without thinking, I started saying the phrases and tapping as I read.
I have been a student of A Course in Miracles as well, but I have fallen off my practice. It is time to return, and I will be taking EFT with me on the journey to tap away the guilt and the illusion of separation.
Thank you so much for sharing!
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