Don't have to discuss the gory details while using EFT

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By Rehana Webster

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HP was assigned to have EFT sessions with me in early May.  He was assessed as high-risk and recidivist.  The reason was that HP had pulled out of the Cognitive Behavior Therapy program he was to undertake as part of his court sentence.  He was given a choice of participating in EFT sessions or face being ‘breached’ if he didn’t comply. 

From the first appointment it was clear that HP was not happy to be there.  This 6-foot plus, solid – built like a heavyweight boxer, tattooed, macho man was as uncommunicative as a brick wall.  He was determined to not give an inch.  He was complying by showing up but he didn’t have to participate.  Any questions I asked were answered with monosyllables and he made no attempt to make any eye contact with me.  I could have been talking to myself! 

There was a flicker of interest when I told HP that this therapy was non-analytical, simple, quick and had lasting effects and was entirely ‘private’.  He could do it in his head and not share anything with me.  He was definitely interested now as he sat up in his chair, faced me as asked how it worked.  I talked about the body’s energy system being unbalanced and negative emotions, etc. 

Finally, with his permission I tapped on the points on his face and hand.  We didn’t explore the setup statement or gamut procedure.  I wanted to take it one step at a time.  I asked HP to think of an event he felt upset about and scale it from 0-10.  This was a problem for HP and he couldn’t fathom it out.  I could see from his face, which was tense, nostrils flaring, eyes narrowing and shallow breathing, that it was high on the scale.  I demonstrated to how he could give me an approximation.  I held both arms wide apart saying that was equal to a 10, then brought my arms forward to equate to a 5 and in front of my body to equate to 1 or 0.  This made sense to him and he admitted that the upset was a 10+.  He did not want to share the event with me and said so. 

I asked him to run the event in his mind like a movie, just like it had occurred in the past.  He refused to verbalize anything and a reminder statement was out of the question.  So I used the following phrases as I tapped on him: 

          Remember what happened 

          Remember all the details you can about this event 

          Remember what you said

          Remember what was said 

          Remember what you heard 

          What was going on around you 

          What do you remember seeing 

          What were you feeling at the time 

          Where in your body were you feeling those feelings 

          What did those feelings feel like 

          Was there any temperature or movement to these feelings 

          Were there any sounds or smells to these feelings 

          Was there any taste in your mouth…….

I did all the verbalizing and I watched his eyes to determine whether he was feeling, listening or viewing by where his eyes were travelling during the tapping.  After about six rounds of tapping I noticed his breathing change and his whole body relax noticeably.  His face softened and he looked me straight in the eyes and said, "it doesn’t seem that important any more”.  HP is not a man of many words as you may have guessed. 

I gave him his little notebook (each client gets one so they can record dates, frequency and issues they are required to tap on as homework) and asked him to record the number of times he tapped before his next appointment the following week.  I had my doubts that HP would follow up on or even take this EFT session seriously. 

The following week HP was waiting for me and I knew immediately something was very different about him.  His whole body language was different.  He even had a hint of a smile.  Before our session commenced, I had taken a phone call and disagreement has ensured.  As I was airing my feeling rather fervently HP looked me straight in the eyes and with a straight face said “YOU HAD BETTER TAP ON IT”…..Well, talk about a pattern interrupt on me…I was blown away and burst into laughter and so did HP.  This was a different man from last week! 

HP told me that he had tapped frequently on many of the ‘STINK’ experiences of his life and really found it was making a difference to his attitude.  He couldn’t seem to bring up those old negative feeling on the issues he had tapped on.  He also informed me that he had spoken to other ‘BROS’ (his friends who are on strength at this office) and told them about this wonderful technique and urged them to get on the EFT program too.  What an amazing change in his attitude. 

HP did not use his notebook to record anything and I don’t think he will.  We only had a couple more sessions together.

Several years later I was in Pukekohe browsing outside a store in the main street when this handsome, slim and smiling man came up to me and said hello.  I didnt recognize him and he said...dont you remember me...tap, tap, tap. 

What a pleasant surprize.  Here was the evidence that HP had changed and maintained the changes brought about by the EFT sessions.  He told me that he was building his house and was very happy with his wife and kids and new behaviours!

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5 Comments

Virginia
Posted October 16, 2010 02:44 PM

I rejoice that you found a way to help so profoundly. Thank you for sharing that wonderful approach. I am printing it off in case I shall have need of it.

Rehana Webster
Posted October 16, 2010 06:28 PM

Thanks for your comments Virginia. Hope you can use this in the future.

Debi Stanley
Posted February 26, 2011 02:26 PM

I had tears in my eyes halfway thru this. Amazing stuff, this EFT. I feel what the computer has meant for technology, Eft will do for healing. EFT4MeDebi

Rehana Webster
Posted February 26, 2011 04:35 PM

Hi Debi, thanks for your comments. I want to share with you that after having worked with HP I had not seen him for several years. One day while I was doing some chores in town, someone called out my name. I looked around and there was this handsome, fit man...with a big smile on his face. His voice sounded familiar but I didn't recognize him. It was HP...he was totally different from the man I had treated with EFT years ago. He had lost heaps of weight, was as fit as a fiddle and clean shaven!

He told me that since our sessions, he had got his life together, his relationship together and employed as well. And he was building a house for his family. What a change. Was it EFT. Yes. He had freed himself from his past demons and moved forward to realize his potentials as a human being, a father and a husband. How good is that, eh???? ;-)

Rehana Webster
Posted February 26, 2011 04:48 PM

Thanks for your comments Debi, We are so fortunate to have EFT!

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While EFT has produced remarkable clinical results, it must still be considered to be in the experimental stage and thus practitioners and the public must take complete responsibility for their use of it.

In addition, the articles on this site represent the views of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the founder of EFT, Gary Craig, nor the owner of this web site, Stefan Gonick.